Create an especially effective way to edit out informality since the non-writer can read each sentence aloud, letting the words hover in mind for a few seconds. 

Model Report Post and Generating Ideas Table Post

Overcoming the Problem of Informality in WTNG 220 Reports

Note: Make your title page look like this one and study my model report below to see the content requirements for this first report and to answer the questions after it for your “Model Report” post assignment.  Post your answers to those questions, which reflect my grading criteria.

This report covers the common problem of informality in WTNG 220 reports and offers solutions.  At RWU, incoming How Writing Works students are used to writing essays, which usually allow for certain levels of informality due to the academic audience—often RWU peers.  Essay introductions and conclusions both permit brief narrations, audience-grabbing questions, and even personal pronouns, yet the report genre usually requires its writers to remain hidden so that the explained information stands out, not the writer.  In this report, section one covers the causes and effects of informality in reports while section two offers solutions to that editing issue.

 

The Causes and Effects of Informality in Reports

Informality occurs for two main reasons.  Most obviously, personal pronouns create too casual of a tone for most reports because they highlight the writer (“I,” “my,” etc.), the reader (“you”), or both (“we,” “us,” “our,” etc.). Hyland and Jiang (2017) even consider that such pronouns are “often considered the defining marker of informality,…” (p. 41).  Because personal pronouns stand out so clearly, they do “mark” a common WTNG 220 report problem, especially the personal references to “I” and “we.”  If a writer says, “I found that 22% of students felt alienated,” then he or she stresses themselves (what they discovered), not the statistic, and for that reason, report writers should hide themselves.  Along with obvious personal pronouns, informality is created because of conversational phrasing, such as “slang, inappropriate contractions, and unspecified abbreviations” (“Formal,” 2021), as well as clichés, jargon, and emotional wording.  Experts note, “Controversial issues can often bring out some extreme emotions …” (Excelsior Online Writing Lab [EOWL], n.d.), and writers will often express those deep feelings with conversational words: “obvious,” “heart-felt,” “terrible,” “mindless,” etc.  The problem with such verbiage is that they stress the writer’s opinion about a topic, not information about the issue itself.

A problem/solutions report is often called a proposal, which aims to get the audience to take the issue seriously and to act according to the proposed solutions. However, informality in these documents will lead to various credibility damaging effects.  To start, casual wording makes a writer look unknowing—ignorant about the problem.  The concept of informality “presupposes the existence of formality and a recognized set of practices built on a structure, authority or system” (Hyland & Jiang, 2017, p. 40).  If writers don’t “recognize” an element that fails to fit the formal report genre, then they will less likely to be believed.  Another credibility injuring effect of informality is that it implies that the writer is uncaring, that he or she is indifferent to their words’ effects on readers.  Bullock and Weinberg (2019) state, “readers will always react better to a reasonable, respectful presentation than to anger or self-righteousness” (p. 250), two emotions that would stress the writer’s feelings and potentially alienate the audience.  Furthermore, informal report writers will lose credibility by suggesting that they are unskilled since they fail to “use a reasoned tone that is appropriate” (EOWL, n.d.).  For instance, if a writer adds a cliché, such as “two heads are better than one” to explain the importance of getting tutorial help to combat informal wording, then the phrasing will stress the writer’s lack of diction instead of the point itself.  Editing out informality takes knowledge and skill, so when a writer fails to put in the effort to replace conversational words with more neutral ones, readers will conclude that he or she simply lacks grammatical control.

 

The Solutions to a Report’s Casual Tone

To solve the problem of informality in a WTNG 220 report, students can take the following steps:

• Put  the paper aside for a few days—i.e., this tactic will cause writers to forget what they wrote and thus be able to edit more objectively since they will have forgotten what they said.  Composition experts (as cited in “Formal,” 2021) remind, “Formal writing is … about relaying a message while keeping in line with the ‘formal’ writing customs,” such as neutral word usage.  Inappropriate words will stand out more clearly when full statements are not remembered.

 

• Use the Ctrl/F function to search for informal words—e.g., “thing,” “quote,” “you,” etc.  This computer tip opens up a search box, so writers can add an informal word (especially ones that they have used in past papers) and find it with a single click.  As professionals suggest, technology can be an effective editing tool (Bullock & Weinberg, 2019, p. 360), especially if a report is long. (Note: For Apple computers, students would use the Command/F keys.)

 

• Read aloud to hear informality since “formal writers show objectivity” (Hyland & Jiang, 2017, p. 40).  When writers not only see but hear their words, informal phrasing stands out more clearly since two of the senses are being employed.  With this auditory step, personal pronouns like “I” and “we” are especially noticeable and can be edited.

 

• Get help—i.e., a tutor or even a friend/peer offers an important editing source because, as Bullock and Weinberg (2019) contend, a non-writer might “hear problems” that the writer simply cannot spot (p. 360).  If a writer has a habit of informality, then he or she will easily miss conversational or emotional words simply because of their commonality.  Another person, however, might easily spot such casual prose and point it out.

Steps 3 and 4 above can often be combined to create an especially effective way to edit out informality since the non-writer can read each sentence aloud, letting the words hover in mind for a few seconds.  In fact, when a tutor reads aloud, the writer can often hear the problem him or herself, the different voice accenting informal wording that the writer could easily miss.

The editing solutions to informality will provide two important benefits.  First, by eliminating casual wording, the writer will prevent distractions and thus more smoothly deliver the report’s content.  According to composition experts (Bullock & Weinberg, 2019), proposal writers are “trying to persuade readers to act, [so] … tone is important …” (p. 250).  If writers can avoid interruptions by removing personal references, they can stress the document’s information, and the solutions will more likely be believed and “acted” upon.  For instance, if a writer builds a report around Covid’s effects on college students and possible solutions to that important problem, he or she will highlight the causes, effects, and solutions to the issue, not themselves, if they eliminate all distracting, subjective wording, such as personal examples and emotional adjectives and adverbs (“huge,” “sadly,” etc.).  In addition, another benefit to editing out informality is that doing so establishes the writer’s ethos, defined as the “character or disposition of a person. … As an author, you need to craft strong ethos appeals to highlight the credibility of your own work” (EOWL, n.d.).  To be believable, a writer needs to show objectivity (not subjectivity and “I” stressed), intelligence (with facts, not opinions implied through emotional words), and goodwill (not selfishness through continual informal references to the writer).  In terms of the three rhetorical appeals (ethos, pathos, logos), Aristotle considered ethos to be the most crucial one for persuasion (Bullock & Weinberg, 2019, p. 33).

Most incoming WTNG 220 students at RWU have done little formal writing, so they must understand the causes and effects of informality, as well as the solutions to that common problem.  Since informal words are both insidious and persistent, they require extra editing attention.  For more information about formality and informality, students can check the sources below, consult the Internet, or contact their WTNG 220 professor.

 

 

References

Bullock, R. & Weinberg, F.  (2019).  The Norton field guide to writing with handbook. 

New York: Norton.

Excelsior Online Writing Lab.  (n.d.).  Ethos.  Retrieved June 28, 2022, from

Formal tone in academic writing: Tips to achieve it.  (2021).  Retrieved June 22, 2022,

from https://besteditproof.com/en/academy/formal-tone-in-academic-writing-tips

Hyland, K. & Jiang, F. (2017).  Is academic writing becoming more informal? English for

specific purposes.   Vol. 45.: 40-51. Retrieved June 29, 2022, from

https://doi.org/10.1016/j.esp.2016.09.001

 

 

Questions for Post Assignment

Remember my definition for an “A” report: paragraphs organized logically, focused clearly, developed specifically, and directions followed faithfully, as well as concise, coherent, correct sentencing.  The questions below reflect these ideas.

• To organize a body pgh logically, use my SERIOUS planning acronym: Steps, Effects, Reasons, Illustrations, Opposites, Units/parts, Similarities.  In my four body pghs above, I use a different plan for each body pgh: which letter do I use for each (fill in—first one done to show what I mean):   1^st body: R plan (pgh built around more than one “reason”).     2^nd body:                3^rd body:             4^th body:

 

• To focus clearly, add a short, clear topic sentence and two or more structural points.  In the four body pghs above, how many ST’s appear in each pgh (i.e., how many times do I STIR to build each pgh?)?  Again, I answer the first question to help you to understand.   1^st body: 2 ST’s              2^nd body:              3^rd body:           4^th body:

 

• To develop specifically, you need to offer research and to ICE right (introduce, cite, explain).  How many times do I offer specific evidence (research) in each body pgh?   1^st body:    2^nd body:   3^rd body:          4^th body:

 

• To follow directions faithfully, you need to add all the required content elements illustrated above to your own report.  Fill in those requirements here.  Number of body pghs:        Number of headings:         Number of visuals:          Number of sources:         Number of research quotes per body pgh:     What goes before the introduction?       What goes after the conclusion?

 

• Concise sentencing means tight phrasing, mainly of your subjects and verbs.  Which of these sentences shows concise wording?                                             A)  To be believable, it is objectivity that writers must show.                                B) To be believable, a writer needs to show objectivity.                                       C)  To be believable, there are objective steps to be taken.

 

• Coherence means a smooth flow of ideas.  Which sentence pair below shows that clear flow the best?
•  A)  The editing solutions to informality will provide two important benefits.  The writer will prevent distractions and thus more smoothly deliver the report’s content.
•  B)  The editing solutions to informality will provide two important benefits.  When casual wording is eliminated, the writer will prevent distractions and thus more smoothly deliver the report’s content.
• C)  The editing solutions to informality will provide two important benefits.  First, by eliminating casual wording, the writer will prevent distractions and thus more smoothly deliver the report’s content.

 

• Correctness deals with editing for grammatical errors.  Which sentence(s) below shows a lack of correctness?
•  A)  By eliminating casual wording, it prevents distractions.
• B)  Writers who eliminate casual wording prevent distractions, this leads to a smoother delivery of the report’s content.
• C)  First by eliminating casual wording the writer will prevent distractions, and thus more smoothly deliver the report’s content.

 

Note: After you post your answers, check them with my “Annotated Informality Report Model.”