After reading the example essays, choose the critique for this reading response. Discuss what you believe are the strengths and weaknesses of your selected essay.
Writing Question
Write a minimum of 750 words.
Provide a clear introduction and thesis statement.
First, and most importantly, please read the example student essays available to you i. Do not move forward with this assignment until you have completed this step. After reading the example essays, choose the critique for this reading response. Your essay should discuss what you believe are the strengths and weaknesses of your selected essay. Plan to ignore any major spacing issues present and focus on the argument itself.
Consider what the author did well and what they could have improved. In addition, you are welcome to discuss how reviewing this example provides you with ideas on either what to do or what not to do in your own essay. Since student names are removed in these examples, you will not be able to provide appropriate credit in the body of your work through citations. You can, however, offer a general introduction to the source, like: “As the author of example essay one notes…” If you find looking at sample work helpful, you can make that known in this response. Please try to develop reasons why reviewing sample work can be useful for your own writing. This type of reflection is also an important part of our process the essay is here
We Truly Are What We Eat
There are many opinions when it comes to the food we consume. There are levels to how food is processed and categories that separate what most deem acceptable and unacceptable. Researchers have delicately tested certain additives and processes to help determine what should regularly be consumed and what should be avoided. Psychologists have explored the effect on children and how it differs from adults consuming the same products. The research presented compares the levels of processing from the last 20 years and the way food processing is trending for the future. This paper will prove the negative effects of the processes and preservatives used in food today and how they affect the consumer’s health. While researching, it became apparent that many factors have gone into the current state of consumer health. The processes by which many foods are made were started to better the consumer but have quickly gotten out of hand. In an article from Harvard’s School of Public Health, it is stated that food used to be processed to add to the nutritional value before making its way to the consumer (“Processed Foods and Health”). However, in recent years many harmful additives have made their way into highly processed foods which have been shown to cause health problems and diseases related to the overconsumption of these products. In addition to these additives, the socioeconomic status of the consumer has contributed to the unhealthful state of consumers. Not only are adults experiencing shorter life spans, but new research is showing how children are being heavily affected by these additives as well. Initially, the refining process was meant to add back to the product what had to be removed to prepare the product to be presented to the consumer. In “Processed Foods and Health”, this is discussed, stating foods were “fortified with iron and vitamin B to prevent anemia, vitamin D to prevent rickets, wheat flour fortified with folic acid to prevent birth defects, and iodine added to salt to prevent goiter”. Other processeslike pasteurization were completed to prevent the spread of bad bacteria. In more recent years, other more harmful additives have made their way into consumer goods. Preservatives were added to allow the product to keep longer, and refined sugars were added to make the taste more appealing. What started out protecting the consumer soon turned into a marketing tactic to entrap the consumer into buying more of the products that are harmful. In 2009 a classification system was introduced to categorize the processing levels that are done on foods before they are presented to the consumer. The NOVA(which is not an acronym, but a name) classification system usesfour categories to display the varying degrees of food processes: unprocessed or minimally processed foods, processed culinary ingredients, processed foods, and highly or ultra-processed foods (“Processed Foods and Health”). NOVA has set the categories in a broad manner, so some items are hard to classify into a specific level due to having some additives but having few alterations to the overall process. Minimally processed foods and culinary ingredients are processed only by milling, grinding, refrigerating, fermenting, etc., to prepare the product for consumption. However, processed and highly or ultra-processed foods are where the real issue lies. They are typically the go-to products for many American families. The latter two categories are the processed foodsthat need little to no preparation with preservatives added to give a longer shelf life. What once was a refining process has become a way to cripple the consumer by adding preservatives and flavors that create an addictive property as well as a convenience that many do not bother to address. American families are typically busy and will go to the store to get items that are quick and require minimal effort to prepare. Children are inadvertently targeted by the bulk of these additives being placed in foods such as snacks and cereals. The foods that are highly processed have added chemicals to make them look more appealing, and preservatives to keep them fresh longer (McCarthy). In addition to preservatives and chemicals, artificial colors are added to make food look more enticing, which have been linked to increased symptoms for disorders such as ADHD (McCarthy). Children are still developing, so consuming these products in large quantities at a young age sets them up for many health issues as they get older. Children also tend to be less mindful of portion control, resulting in the consumption of a more significant amount of these foods allowing these chemicals to do more irreparable damage to their bodies and minds (McCarthy). With the number of added chemicalsreaching double and triple what they previously were, children are at a higher risk now than they ever have before. The use of coloring and flavorings that are being added deliberately to entice children to consume these products has raised concerns among researchers and pediatricians alike. In addition to the chemicals added to the food that is being consumed, the packaging that these items come in has also raised concern, namely the plastic covering and the cardboard boxes with both containing additional toxins and chemicals. The disease being recorded in highest numbers in pediatrics is thyroid-related diseases. Most of the toxins and chemicals added are known to interfere with thyroid function. This can disrupt early brain development leaving children to develop life-altering health conditions. In recent years, more researchers have become concerned with the link between chronic disease and death with the food that people are consuming. Many researchers look specifically at the American or Western diet as a source for the American people’s rising health conditions and mental health conditions. Regular consumption of these highly or ultra-processed foods has been directly linked with heart disease, stroke, some cancers, and many mental health disorders which are all occurring in younger people than they have in the last decade. Data collected shows that “America is 71% overweight or obese—not 66% which was reported five years ago” (Fuhrman). There has been a steady increase in overweight Americans due to what Fuhrman describes as “food deserts.” Food deserts are areas where Americans do not have accessto fresh produce or live in low-income areas, causing unhealthy foods to be the less expensive option. It is partially due to these socio-economic conditions that these Americans are subjected to double the risk of heart attack and diabetes before the age of 45 (Fuhrman). Along with heart disease and stroke, diabetes is higher now than it has ever been in America. The rise in diabetesin the US has been linked to the overconsumption of ultra-processed foods. In the last five years, the likelihood for developing diabetes due to lifestyle choices went up 15% when the diets caloric intake consists of 22% of highly or ultra-processed foods. “The connection held up even after scientists accounted for known risk factors for diabetes, such as weight and physical activities” (“Processed Foods and Health”). In addition to diabetes becoming more common other comorbidities are on the rise. The foods that people consume are highly processed, but the drinks are as well. Many Americans prefer the sugary and processed drink optionsrather than the healthier option leading to other organs having depleted nutrients. Fuhrman illustrates this in his article, stating that it typically starts with dehydration, leading to slowed kidney function as well as restricted gastrointestinal movements. Selhub agrees with this, stating that along with slowed intestinal movements, the intestines become overwhelmed with “bad” bacteria, which prevents nutrients from being absorbed and causes inflammation and a host of other issues. The “bad” bacteria also prevent the “good” bacteria from sending neurotransmitters to release serotonin which affects sleep and appetite, mediates mood, and inhibits pain. “Since about 95% of your serotonin is produced in your gastrointestinal tract, it makes sense that the inner workings of your digestive system don’t just help you digest food, but also guides your emotions” (Selhub). Selhub comparesfood to engine fuelstating, “like an expensive car, your brain functions best when it gets only premium fuel.” Both Selhub and Fuhrman discuss how the body breaks down highly processed foods and how it affects brain activity. By consuming these foods regularly, brain function is lower due to the harmful substances that have made their way to the brain. Not only do many experience fatigue and brain fog, but it can even lead to mental disorders such as depression. “Multiple studies have found a correlation between a high diet in refined sugars and impaired brain function—and even a worsening of symptoms of mood disorders” (Selhub). When the brain is deprived of vital nutrients and instead hasfree radicals and inflammatory cells circulating its space, further damage and injury can be expected. Researchers suggest Americans follow a more “traditional” diet rather than the Western diet due to the “traditional” diet having a 25% to 35% lower risk of depression (Selhub). A more traditional diet includes more itemsfrom the minimally processed category of NOVA, meaning the food is without the refined sugars and are unprocessed. Therefore, it is more likely to contain probiotics, which promotes gut health. Fuhrman believes it is dire to cut out candy, soda, chips, etc., due to a link to lowered brain activity in those that regularly consume these highly processed foods and drinks. Additionally, Fuhrman suggests a lower caloric intake for a healthier life, preventing further damage caused by refined sugars and preservatives. “Over 55% of the standard American diet’s calories are processed foods, and about 33% of calories come from animal products” (Fuhrman). Based on the standards of the “traditional” diet more nuts, beans, vegetables, and whole grains should be consumed in order to retain a balance that allows the body time to fully digest meals and prevent an insulin spike which happens when consumers regularly take in refined sugars. With the decision to limit the highly or ultra-processed foods in the consumer diet, the likelihood of developing these illnesses are drastically decreased. A regulated diet consisting of nutrient-rich foods and whole foods allows the body to gradually digest and absorb the essential nourishment needed to keep the body energized and functioning correctly. Though manufacturers can add synthetic vitamins and minerals to certain processed foods, these foods should not be substituted for whole foods and vegetables that naturally contain these healthful compounds. Vegetables, whole foods, and nuts all provide components such as antioxidants, anti-inflammatory effects, and anticarcinogenic effects, dramatically improving the health of the consumer. While researchers have provided the data suggesting minimally processed foods be the staple in consumer diets, it is not alwaysrealistic for the consumer. Assuggested, certain groups of consumers have accessto and the meansto follow a more “traditional” diet assuggested. However, the group of consumers who are in “food deserts,” are unable to make the changes necessary to avoid early heart disease and other chronic illnesses. The World Health Organization and Food and Drug Administration should be better regulating the number of chemicals, additives, flavors, and preservatives added to products that are meant for the consumer. At this time, over 1000 different chemicals have been cleared by the FDA to be added to highly or ultra-processed foods in America, many of which are prohibited in other countries due to their harmful nature. If the consumer were to limit the consumption of these foods, then overall health would increase. However, more and more foods are being altered before making it to the grocery store shelf preventing the consumer from having a better option. Low-income families may not have accessto better options, nor can they afford better options at times. The World Health Organization started making posters in the 90s to illustrate how many fruits, vegetables, and grains consumers should have at every meal. Providing thisinformation is only half of the responsibility in providing better food options for future consumers. Children are the target for much of the highly processed foods, which is evident in the data, which shows the rise of childhood obesity at 13.4% among 2– 5-year-olds, 20.3% among 6–11-year-olds, and 21.2% among 12–19-year-olds, according to the CDC. Through all the research provided, it is glaringly apparent that the American diet needsto change. There are many viewsto investigate which allow the consumer to fully see the effects of regularly consuming highly or ultra-processed foods. Researchers and psychologists alike have studied the effects on the body and mind due to this lifestyle choice. Between the illnesses and mental health disorders that can arise from the additives in processed foods, the data is clear that consuming these foodsin large quantitiesis unsustainable. The initial processto prepare food for the consumer is not as harmful as the growing changes that are made now to add chemicals, flavors, and preservatives to otherwise suitable foods.
